"The Best Decade"

This afternoon, I went to Ft. Smith to get my teeth cleaned. The dental assistant and I started talking about "The Best Decades" and which we preferred.

She told me that if she were able, she would live in her 20s forever.

I thought quickly back to that decade in my life. I went to college six years in a row during that decade--going to school full time and working full time. Going to graduate school. Teaching an insane number of hours and trying to balance everything that was important in my life. Too many things going on...very little balance in any one thing. If I thought school and work were going well, it was more difficult to manage the social and church areas of my life. Romance was hit or miss--mostly miss. I was making up for lost time--since I never really had time to date, pursue that part of my emotional life. It felt like my 20s involved seeking a balance I just couldn't manage for long.

Heading into my 30s was frightening, I will admit. I hadn't married, had worked professionally for four years--teaching at CASC right after graduate school. I had a LOT of things going well for me, but a lot of questions. My body was changing--I cannot explain how scary it was when I realized my metabolism was changing and I couldn't keep my weight down doing the same things and eating the same diet. In addition to the weight changes, I realized my energy levels were dropping drastically and I couldn't maintain the same crazy schedules I'd adopted or been used to (sometimes by necessity).

I suppose, if I'm being honest, the first three or so years of my 30s decade was full of a lot of self-doubt, and, very importantly, soul searching. I really had no idea what my life held, and I'm referring to its permanence. I wasn't sure of anything--would I stay in Poteau? Go back to graduate school? Move away? Find someone?

But I found myself growing in faith. When I look back, I realize that the first half of the 30s decade was really spent growing in my faith. For once, I had a job and I didn't have a gazillion-and-one things I had to do to "get by" and I could go back to something that had meant so much to me all along--something that I had just not had the time for in my 20s.

Yes, I went to church. I have always gone to church. God has always been important to me. My faith is the core of my being. But I really didn't have time to pursue my faith as I had so many other things--it got shoved downward on the priority list for most of the decade--out of pure necessity, I'm sorry to say.

I told the lady helping me at the dentist's office that I thought my 30s were definitely my favorite decade. She said that she thought it was true that we don't really know who we are fully, or "come into our own," until our 30s.

Thus far, for me, my 40s (granted, I've not even made it a whole year through the first of them!) have been great, though comical in parts (realizing my knee wouldn't function like it used to function on demand, for instance!). I know I'm getting older, and there are times when I scare myself when I think of my age!, but I am really enjoying my life right now, where I am, what's going on.

I feel as young as ever--better, actually! It's nice when body, mind, and soul get to a "leveling off," where they can grow and operate together...

We both agreed that we thought our parents were "so old" when they were our ages.

What was I thinking?!?